"home-but-hiding"
telephone territory
"quick-build"
judicial committee
'going over the questions'
dif'd
"home-but-hiding"
telephone territory
"quick-build"
judicial committee
'going over the questions'
dif'd
if this has already been posted up - then i missed it.. this question box left me .
.
My sister got engaged afer I first became inactive. I had not been reproved or 'caught' in any wrongdoing. Simply put, I was just not at meetings or in service. (I was however still making an appearance at assemblies) At the time, I was engaged to be married to my now husband who was also inactive. She phoned me in tears one day explaining she could not have me be in her wedding party b/c the elder they wanted to perform the ceremony (which was not even going to be in a KH) would not preside over te wedding if I (being inactive) were in the wedding party. I told her not to worry it was ok. But it was another nail in the coffin for me...
confidential letter child abuse http://adf.ly/auxbu.
to all bodies of elders.
the congregation secretary should arrange for this letter to be retained in the congregation permanent file of policy letters.
Data-Dog: "The flock could be told," Obey the FDS, even when it makes no sense."
I seem to remember reading the flock was told something along those lines recently. Was it at the convention or the annual meeting maybe?
tell us a little about yourself and your family.. married with a child.
live in a little city in new england.. were you a born in or a convert?.
parents and family yes.
oops- i missed:
Was there anything you looked forward to doing when you left?
. Living a normal life- allowing my child to have one!!
What are you most proud of achieving since you left?
. Realizing that despite not being trained to be a drone, my child has a love for God. (It IS possible!!)
tell us a little about yourself and your family.. married with a child.
live in a little city in new england.. were you a born in or a convert?.
parents and family yes.
Tell us a little about yourself and your family.
Married with a child. Live in a little city in New England.
Were you a born in or a convert?
Born in.
Are your parents / family JWs?
Parents and family yes. Husband and I irregular/inactive for years
How many generations have been JWs?
3 generations
Did you hold any position in the WTS? (MS, Elder etc...)
Regular Pioneered after HS.
Did you *really* believe in the bible, in spirits (angels, demons)?
Yes all of it. Still do actually.
Did you get baptised? When and why?
Baptised at age 17. Why? B/c I found out my younger brother was going over the questions and i knew there would be 'talk' if he was and I wasnt. Also b/c I had been saying all along I would pioneer out of HS.
What was the initial trigger that made you start questioning things?
Finding out about Candace Conti and then ALLLLLL the others and knowing MY OWN was not an isolated case... got a glimpse of CoC and became more angry. Watching a faithful loved one die was also a turning point...
Where did you find information? Internet sites? Books?
Internet
How difficult or painful was the process of leaving?
There was a LOT of anger. Especially this summer when I really allowed myself to read up on the history and court cases. I was depressed for weeks. It continues to be painful. Its difficult coming to terms with the fact Ive been lied to. My parents put the org (and so much more) before their concern for me. Also knowing that my whole family continues to buy into it. They arent yet aware of my current JW non-status. But knowing they will shun me and that ill have to explain the whys to my child is something i struggle with alot.
Was it a big dramatic exit or a careful quiet fade?
Its been fairly quiet fade so far.
Did you convince anyone else to leave with you?
Im just working on making myself strong enough to continue. Husband is inactive too so I dont expect too much difficulty there...
How were your family relations affected by your decision?
Not really yet.
Were you or are you still being shunned by those who didn't leave?
My family will - I dont doubt it at all.
How long have you now been out?
Irregular to inactive since 1996. Havent turned in a service report, gone out in fs or given a talk since that time. Really mentally out since the memorial in 2013. I was there, but didnt feel it anymore. Felt like an outsider.
Was there anything you looked forward to doing when you left?
Living a normal life- allowing my child to have one!!
What are you most proud of achieving since you left?
Realizing that despite not being trained to be a drone, my child has a love for God. (It IS possible!!)
Is there anything you miss about life in the congregation?
no.
Red pill or blue pill? Do you regret waking up to reality at all?
It was very hard. I dont regret it. Anything in life good is worth the effort.
Did you become an atheist or transfer your faith elsewhere?
I dont see myself joining another organized faith. But I do feel like I have faith. Its the org I dont trust.
How do you now feel about religion in general?
I feel religion has little to do with my faith and spirituality.
Do you feel any guilt celebrating xmas or birthdays or doing any other JW "no-no"s?
No- its just all very new and still figuring out what things make sense and fit with my faith.
Have you attended any face-to-face meetups of ex-JWs?
no
Describe your circle of friends - mostly other ex-JWs or regular people?
a few ex-JWs who have been really supportive. And others just regular people. My friends are my family.
Do you tell people about your JW past?
I have yes. I also tell them Im not there anymore
Do you feel animosity or pity toward current JWs?
depends on which one you point to.
How do you respond to witnesses when they call at your door?
i use to hide. but now I would love for them to come by and try to encourage me. I would love to show them how happy and NOT discouraged i am! ;-)
Storm the barricades or tend to the wounded? (do you favor activism or support)
support
What do you think is the most effective approach to reaching people still in?
thought provoking questions. once they have achieved some space from the org (inactive) introduce them to CoC. this is what a friend did for me.
Do you think the WTS can or should be destroyed, will continue on as-is or grow / change?
i dont believe it really has Gods backing so its entirely possible it will go down.
How has your life been impacted by your JW past?
I am seeing more ways everyday as memories come back. I hadnt realized how many things I accepted and repressed. In terms of the positive tho, I have a few close friends (ex-JWs) and my husband whom I might have not met had it not been for our similar starts on our lifes paths...
Are there things in your life you blame the WTS for?
ABSOLUTELY. Parental/family relationships being so bad. Constantly fighting my own negative attitude and judgemental tendencies. Losing touch with friends I loved b/c they saw the light before me and I had to shun them like a good dub.
JW upbringing - a protection or a curse?
Double edged sword.
How do you fill your time now it's not filled with meetings and field service?
With my little family- doing things we love together.
Do you still have an interest in JW beliefs and doctrines?
Only to know what my extended family is being fed..
How much of your time is still spent on JW related matters?
none- unless you count coming to sites like this for support.
What do you think of the ex-JW community?
its been interesting and very helpful.
Do you see yourself still being associated with the ex-JW community in 5 or 10 years time?
possibly-
Do you fear the future?
i try not to but im a parent too....
What advice would you give to anyone starting the journey of leaving the WTS?
Take your time. trust your instincts. Its a process. If you still believe in God, keep talking to Him and grow your relationship with him. Its hard for us b/c we have been trained to see the society as our spiritual go-between. But they arent. Music has helped me alot too.
What would you change in your life if you could go back and talk to yourself?
Getting baptised.
Do you have any regrets about life since you left?
no
Can we read your life-story anywhere? (links to online or books)
no
Want to share your own story? Please use the Interview with an Apostate: Template and post it in the Personal Experiences & Reunions section with the title "Interview with an Apostate: [your name or alias]"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=epwihvkwsmc.
just wondering if it strikes any of you too.....
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EpWiHvkWSmc
Just wondering if it strikes any of you too....
as a young teenager, i would look at "apostate" books at the city library.
i was always intrigued as to what was sooo bad and other than a few writings of some that seemed like they hated the witnesses, i would clandestinely look at literature, especially in "christian" bookstores.. it took years for me to finally disconnect.
i will say that ray franz' books enlightened me the most!.
John_Mann wrote: "I still remember my head spinning and the nausea while reading the 2 chapters from CoC.."
me tooooo. I had to put it down. It made me too angry. But once you know, theres just no going back. As hurt and lied to as I felt, Im better off.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=imfuiaeg820.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rkjbvfpjpje.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iezhj13pun4.
i havent listened to a talk since the memorial. That made my stomach turn. As a woman and a parent, im completely disgusted.
just wondering if your name describes what you saw, how you were treated when you were "in" or now "out", maybe your personality, ect.... i'm label licker and the why i picked this name was because of all the licking up one side of elders and down the other to either be an elder or ministerial servant.
one time i was standing right in front of this brother who wasn't made an ms yet and he totally ignored me and talked right over my head speaking really loud trying to catch the co's attention.. got sick of watching the poor elderly sitting all alone or standing against the wall like a wall flower with noone to talk to and yet all these label lickers would take turns picking up the elders elderly parents and take them shopping and do their groceries at least four times a week while out in service, yet, there was noone there to take a meal to a sister who just got out of the hospital with a heart attack.
when i had shown up at her apartment with a meal she asked if i could wash her private and change her bandages.
The song speaks to me now like never before.
# 3 newbie post.
first of all, the newbies have set a record here!.
have you ever seen a 4pg post where 21 new members reply!
Also new here. Well iv lurked for a while, but only registered today. Working on my intro but thanks for making it easier for me to take this initial step.